First of all, I’m not really a single mom. I decided to keep a bit of a journal while Ben was away on a business trip last week and here are some journal entries:

-my house is cleaner.

-re: previous statement- is this because Ben’s absence OR because I rely on him less for help?

-I CAN take the trash out and change the cat little box easily and quickly. (Please don’ t tell him that I said this…)

-there is some kind of pistol under my side of the bed. ONLY because he was out of town. I am anti-gun in the house until I feel threatened. I know how to use it to which also scares me. I wonder if I’d actually be able to pull the trigger if it came down to it though? Or would I just throw it at the perp? (I’ve been watching too many crime dramas)

-I’m a more patient parent. WHY? is it because I know I won’t have any relief so I’m better? or are just the prayers of my family and friends kicking in?

-there is less junk food in the house. This is simultaneously good and bad. Less to bribe the kids with, but less to binge eat on when I’m feeling like emotionally eating.

-I justify eating out more.

-I drink more caffeine.

-I sleep much better. I woke up sleeping diagonally and it was GREAT!

-re: previous statement- it MAY be because I take Tylenol PM assuming I won’t be sleeping at all.

-I found his candy stash and had mini snickers bars for dinner one night.

-As much as I liked having the bed to myself the first few nights, by tonight I missed him.

-The kids watched more tv. Liiiiiike way more than I’m going to tell you.

-I’m so glad to have him home…